Fw: MOTHERHOOD:LOVE AND SEX FOR A MAN;

----- फ़ॉरवर्ड किया गया मैसेज -----
द्वारा: aryan gang <dr_aryangang@yahoo.co.in>
To: cheena blogger <anilgangotia.cheena@blogger.com>
Cc: Anil Gangotia <anilgangotia@hotmail.com>
भेजा गया: रविवार, 18 दिसंबर, 2011 1:18 PM
विषय: MOTHERHOOD:LOVE AND SEX FOR A MAN;

 

MOTHERHOOD:
LOVE AND SEX FOR A MAN;
By natural instinct, a man seeks a woman to gratify his sexuality.

A man toils day and night and pays highest price by way of surrendering the male ego to keep his spouse clinging to him to gratify his insatiable sexuality.

In the later years of life with aging an oldy becomes the most obedient servant to Her Majesty. In the game of love and sex,

a man is alway...s a looser to earn pride and peace.
LOVE AND SEX FOR A WOMAN;
The natural instinct for procreation is the driving force for a woman to play the most playful game of love and sex to get conceived and attain the subtle and transcendental mental state of

 'Motherhood' (Matratava- मातृत्त्व्).

After the birth of progeny, a woman needs a man to provide security, food and shelter to her and her off springs.

In her later years of life, a woman feels the necessity of a man for companionship and care.

During the whole span of life of a woman, the sex is and had been secondary and love primary to her.

The primary desire of a woman is tender love.

A woman utilizes her body sensuality very wisely and judiciously to get love and offers sex in return.

This pleasurable and most enjoyable game of love and sex fulfils her materialistic demands and desires.

In this game of sensuality and sexuality a woman is always the winner with pride and contentment within.
HARE KRISHNA!

 

- Mohan Lal Agrawal

101 Important Questions To Ask Yourself in Life

"The key to wisdom is knowing all the right questions." – John Simone

What questions do you ask yourself every day?

Believe it or not, the kind of questions you ask determine the kind of life you lead. That's because your questions trigger its own set of answers, which lead to certain emotions, which then lead to certain actions (or inactions), followed by results. If you ask yourself limiting questions, you'll get limited results. If you ask yourself mind-opening, forwarding questions, you'll gain a lot more out of them.

Some people like to ask questions like "Why am I so unlucky?", "What if I had done this earlier?" and "Why am I always in such a situation?". Because these questions are backward looking, the answers you get with them are naturally disempowering. On the other hand, questions like "What can I learn from this experience?", "What can I do differently move forward?" and "What am I grateful for?" are empowering. They provoke you and get you thinking, putting you on the path to a better life.

If you're someone who normally doesn't self-reflect, you might be stumped by questions. However, this is perfectly normal. I remember when I was a small primary school student, the teacher asked us how we would describe ourselves. The question got me stumped, because I had never thought much about it. It took me some time to find some meaningful adjectives to describe myself, but even then they didn't seem right. That was one of the starting points of my self-exploration journey. Somewhere along the way, I became a big fan of introspection, enjoying the process of self-reflecting and thinking over questions.

Today, I believe questions are a key to self-awareness and personal growth. In my 1-1 coaching sessions, I enable my clients to discover the answers to their goals/questions by asking them the right questions. It'd be easy if I just tell my coachees what they "should" do and what they "should not" do. But that's not the point. It's about empowering my clients to discover themselves through asking the right guiding questions, catered to their situation and their profiles. The right questions will help them untangle the blockages in them and connect with their inner self.

It doesn't matter if you get stumped in the beginning, or if you don't know the answers to the questions at first. Our minds are boundless. Just because you don't get an answer immediately, it doesn't mean there are no answers. The answers are there – it's just that your mind is too foggy since you've not consulted it before. The more you ask, the clearer your mind will be, and the more ready you'll be to receive the answers.

Below is a full set of self-reflection questions I've come up to help you live your best life. While the article says 101 questions, there are more than that, and I'll continue to add on over time as I come across new ones. Some of these questions are questions which I ask my 1-1 clients, to uncover the real them. The questions will help you focus on what's important to you, and what you want. They are not meant to be answered all at one shot – they are to be thought over again and again, as part of your growth journey. Pick out a few questions to reflect on today, then bookmark and check back a week later to think over the others. Check back regularly to reflect on the questions.

Remember, there is no 1 final answer. It's a continuous discovery process. Your answers to the questions today will be different from your questions next month, 3 months, 1 year, 3 years down the road. Add it to your weekly review sessions. This is an important article for your growth journey.

Here they are:

1. Who are you?
2. What are you passionate about?
3. What are the achievements you are most proud of?
4. What are you most grateful for in life?
5. What are the most important things to you in life?
6. How would you describe yourself?
7. What are your values? What do you represent? What do you want to embody? (On Day 9 of Live a Better Life in 30 Days, we work together to discover your values.)
   
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8. Do you love yourself?
9. … Why or Why not?
10. How can you love yourself more today?
11. What is your ideal self? What does it mean to be your highest self?
12. Look at your life now. Are you living the life of your dreams?
13. If you have one year left to live, what would you do?
14. If you have one month left to live, what would you do?
15. If you have one week left to live, what would you do?
16. If you have one day left to live, what would you do?
17. If you have an hour left to live, what would you do?
18. If you have one minute left to live, what would you do?
    
19. What would you do today if there is no more tomorrow?
20. What are the biggest things you've learned in life to date?
21. What advice would you give to yourself 3 years ago?
    
22. If you are yourself 1 year from the future, how would you advise the you now? (On Day 22 of 30DLBL, we travel to the future to give advice to the us today.)
23. Is there something you're still holding on to? Is it time to let it go?
24. What are you busy with today? Will this matter 1 year from now? 3 years? 5 years?
25. What are your Quadrant 2 tasks?
26. What opportunities are you looking for?
27. How can you create these opportunities?
28. What are your biggest goals and dreams?
29. What's stopping you from pursuing them? …Why? How can you overcome them?
30. If you are to do something for free for the rest of your life, what would you want to do?
31. What would you do if you cannot fail; if there are no limitations in money, resources, time or networks?
    
32. What do you want to achieve 1 year from now?
33. … 3 years?
34. … 5 years?
35. … 10 years?
36. How important are these goals to you?
37. What if these goals are doubled? Tripled? Magnified by 10? How would you feel? Would you prefer to achieve these or your previous goals?
38. Who are the people who have achieved similar goals? … What can you learn from them?
39. Are you putting any parts of your life on hold? … Why?
40. What's the top priority in your life right now?
41. What are you doing about it?
42. If you were to die tomorrow, what would be your biggest regret? What can you do now to make sure that doesn't happen?
43. For every experience you get: What are the biggest things you have learned?
44. How can you do this better the next time?
45. If you had 1 million dollars, what would you do with it?
    
46. Do you love your job?
47. What is your ideal career?
48. How can you start creating your ideal career starting today?
49. What is your ideal diet?
50. What do you need to do to achieve your ideal diet?
51. What is your ideal home like?
52. What do you need to do to achieve your ideal home?
53. What is your ideal physical look?
54. What do you need to do to achieve your ideal physical look?
55. What is your ideal life?
56. What can you do to start living your ideal life?
57. What would you want to say to yourself 1 year in the future?
58. … 3 years?
59. … 5 years?
60. … 10 years?
61. What do you fear most in life?
62. Is there anything you are running away from?
63. Are you settling for less than what you are worth? … Why?
64. What is your inner dialogue like?
65. What limiting beliefs are you holding on to?
66. Are they helping you achieve your goals?
67. If not, is it time to let them go?
68. What empowering beliefs can you take on to help you achieve your goals?
69. What bad habits do you want to break?
70. What good habits do you want to cultivate?
71. What are the biggest actions you can take now to create the biggest results in your life?
72. Where are you living right now – the past, future or present?
73. Are you living your life to the fullest right now?
74. What is the meaning of life?
75. What is your purpose in life? Why do you exist? What is your mission?
    
76. How can you make your life more meaningful, starting today?
77. What drives you?
78. What are the times you are most inspired, most motivated, most charged up?
79. What did you do during those times? How can you do more of that starting today?
80. How can you change someone's life for the better today?
81. Who are the 5 people you spend the most time with?
82. Are these people enabling you or holding you back?
    
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83. What qualities do you want to embody? (Refer to Q7: Values and Q11: Ideal Self) Where can you meet people who embody these qualities?
84. Who inspire you the most?
85. How can you be like them?
86. What is your ideal life partner like?
87. Where can you find him/her?
88. How can you get to know him/her?
89. Are you afraid of letting others get close to you?
90. … Why?
    
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91. Who is/are the most important person(s) to you in the world?
92. Are you giving them the attention you want to give?
93. How can you spend more time with them starting today?
94. What kind of person do you enjoy spending time with?
95. How can you be this person to others?
96. Who do you want to be like in 1 year?
97. … 3 years?
98. … 5 years?
99. … 10 years?
100. Who are your mentors in life? (formal or informal)
101. What is one thing you're going to do differently after reading this article?

 

Dr.Anil Gangotia

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Articles Adda - 6 Steps to Improve your Relationship with your Spouse

Articles Adda - 6 Steps to Improve your Relationship with your Spouse

How to forgive & forgiven

The closer you are to someone, the more likely you are to step on their toes. And being married to someone certainly puts you in close quarters.So the chances are good that you and your spouse

have sore feet.

Okay, enough of the smelly metaphor. The point is that it's NORMAL for you and your spouse to errand for those "misses" to cause hurt...sometimes

serious hurt.

Did your spouse hurt you? Have you made mistakes

that hurt your spouse?

Except in the case of physical abuse, you can"move on" from anything. In fact, your marriage

can end up even BETTER!

I know...you're probably thinking, "Better? 

How 

could it be better than before we screwed up?"

It CAN be better, but you have to do one thing

first. You have to forgive.

What does it REALLY mean to forgive?

Many people will say, "I forgive you," but continue to harbor anger in their heart. Some people say the words, but it's obvious from their

actions that nothing's changed.

Other people will say "I forgive you" but what they really mean is, "I don't want to talk about this. I can't deal with this. I'm turning you off." And so the 3 magic words come out and form a wall that shuts out their spouse. True, they're not angry, but that's because they've shut down

all emotion and refuse to reconnect.

Saying "I forgive you" is an entirely different 

ball game than truly forgiving.

Look carefully at the word "forgive." It tells you what it means. "For-Give"...in other words, to

GIVE as you did beFORE.

That's true forgiveness. When you GIVE of yourself like you did beFORE you were hurt, then you know you've forgiven. When you stand as close to your spouse as you stood the day your feet got

stepped on...that's forgiveness.

That's not easy to do. But it is possible. You

can forgive each other and move on.

 

Dr.Anil Gangotia

pain & suffering.

When it comes to your emotions, there's a big
difference between being in pain and true
suffering. What's the difference? And how does this
relate to your marriage?

Let me illustrate with a story.

There once was a man who was sentenced to 25
years of backbreaking labor. His wrists were tied
to the handle of a huge wheel that was inlaid in
the wall. His job was to turn the wheel 10 hours
a day.

For years, day in and day out, the prisoner would
wonder what he was doing with this wheel. What
was the meaning of his work? What was on the
other side of this wall? Was he grinding grain?
Pulling up water? Moving some sort of conveyor
belt?

For 25 years he contemplated the meaning of his
work, and for 25 years he spun that wheel. It was
grueling, but he survived.

When his sentence was complete he was released
from prison. The first thing he did was run to
the other side of the wall to see what he had
been doing all this time.

What did he see?

Nothing!

There was nothing attached to the wheel. For 25
years, 10 hours a day, he was spinning a wheel
for absolutely no purpose. When the man realized
his true sentence, he collapsed and died.

The prisoner was able to survive 25 years of
backbreaking labor, but when he realized that it
was all for nothing, he couldn't survive for
another moment.

So what's the difference between pain and
suffering?

Pain has a purpose.

Suffering is true torture because it has no
meaning.

Pain is bearable. Suffering for no reason is
devastating. 

Ask any woman about child labor. How was it?
Would you do it again? Most women will answer: It
was painful, but I didn't suffer. I would do it
again.

This is the key to surviving marital problems and
making it through to a new love and peace with
your spouse.

If you think there's no purpose to your emotional
hurt, you'll just want out. You'll run from your
kids, your responsibility, your vows...you'll run
from it all just to get relief from an unbearable
suffering.

But if you can come to understand why you're in
this situation, then you'll succeed to make it
through like a woman in child labor.

Why is this happening to you? What are you
supposed to be learning from all of this? Can you
see how your marital problems are really an
opportunity for you and your spouse?

I remember A true Story of my friend

when they were going through
what seemed to be unbearable emotional pain as a
result of the loss of their 3 children and their
marriage problems. But now they see it all
differently. Yes, they were in pain, but they didn't
suffer. And although they might script things
differently if they  were God, his wife and he now feel
a sense of peace and happiness that they wouldn't
trade for anything. Yes, they lost a lot, but they
gained each other and forged a marriage that has
become a wellspring of joy in their life.

all the best.....

 

Dr.Anil Gangotia

Happiness & Marriage

if you could just be happy, right? 

But how do you get there? 

The path from a 

troubled marriage to personal happiness is not so

simple, is it?

I was doing a phone session just the other day 

when Jack said to me, "I've got to get out of 

this marriage. I've got to find happiness for 

ME."

In fact, it's quite common for people in an 

unhappy marriage to think that happiness is just 

on the other side of divorce. It's ironic. When 

we're single, we'll be happy when we meet 

someone. Once we're married, we think we'll be 

happy when we're single.

But you know deep down 

, that you 

can't be happy alone.  

Your life is meant to be 

part of another life.

If you focus on YOUR happiness; happiness will 

elude you. But if you focus on your marriage,

you'll find happiness for YOURSELF. In other 

words, being happy is NOT the result of YOU 

trying to be happy. It's the CONSEQUENCE of you 

creating a successful marriage with your spouse.

Pursuing happiness is like a boomerang; 

if it 

comes back to YOU, then you've missed the target.

It's like good sex. Research shows that the more 

you focus on having good sex, the more good sex 

eludes you. The key to good sex is good physical 

conditioning and a deep EMOTIONAL connection. In 

other words, good sex is not something you

pursue; it's something that ensues.

It's the same with your happiness .

It's not something you pursue; it's something

that ensues from efforts that transcend yourself.

The hardest time to focus on your marriage is  

when you're frustrated with your spouse. I know 

that. I know you'd rather turn inward. But if you 

do, you'll narrow your existence. You'll close 

yourself in. You'll shield your pain (to some 

extent), but you'll also turn your back on your

only hope.

You've got to turn and face the darkness in your 

life, 

And I don't mean face it for 

a couple of weeks and then give up because "it 

didn't work." The key to most marital 

circumstances is ENDURANCE. If took you years to 

get yourself into this mess, it's going to take 

more than a couple of weeks to get yourself out

of it.

 

Dr.Anil Gangotia

Priority Marriage asessment

PRIORITY MARRIAGE ASSESSMENT One of the most important skills to learn in order to succeed in your marriage is to "put love first." In other words, to have a good marriage, your spouse and your relationship has to be the absolute highest priority in your life--bar none. Answer the questions below "true" or "false" and see how you're doing. Compare your score with the assessment scale below. True False 1. When my spouse phones, I almost always make time to talk. 2. If I'm with my spouse and someone else phones, I usually don't take the call. 3. I speak to my spouse about non-logistical matters at least twice per day. 4. When something significant happens in my life, I almost always share it with my spouse first. 5. I initiate positive loving physical contact with my spouse at least twice each day. 6. When we go to a social function, I almost always spend at least half my time talking with my spouse. 7. When my spouse walks into the house, I almost always interrupt whatever I am doing to greet my spouse. 8. When I walk into the house, the first thing I usually do is greet my spouse. 9. I spend more time interacting with my spouse than I do watching TV. 10. I spend more time interacting with my spouse than anyone else in my life. 11. I usually interrupt whatever I am doing if my spouse wants my attention. 12. When I need someone to talk to, I almost always talk to my spouse. 13. I almost always recognize in a significant way my spouse's birthday, our anniversary, and other special days. 14. My spouse and I go out alone together at least once per week. 15. My spouse and I go on vacation alone together at least once per year. 16. I have photographs of my spouse in my office, wallet, or gym locker. 17. I have at least one personal and meaningful discussion with my spouse per week for a minimum of twenty-five minutes. 18. I do unnecessary thoughtful things for my spouse regularly. ASSESSMENT SCALE 1-9: OUT OF SHAPE. You're priorities are out of whack.  10-14: AVERAGE. This won't do if you're trying to revamp your marriage.  15-18: MARRIAGE FITNESS CHAMPION. You seem to have your priorities straight.     Dr.Anil Gangotia

Marriage – Respect and Boundaries in Marriage

Marriage – Respect and Boundaries in Marriage Many people think that boundaries are like a "keep out" fence that distance you from your spouse. In fact, appropriate boundaries bring you closer in Marriage. Respect is one of the foundational aspects of a close and healthy marriage. We all want and deserve respect. Below is a list of boundaries and ways to show your spouse respect. Employing these suggestions will have a very positive effect on your marriage. Secrets are appropriate for birthdays and Christmas! Otherwise secrets are very damaging to a marriage. Secrets and lies are cousins. Secrets are unexpressed lies and have no place in a close relationship. Secrets often are about money and relationships. We do not have to share things from our past that we have repented of and that do not affect your relationship today. Keep your mate's flaws private. Do not discuss your spouse's flaws with your family or friends. This is very disrespectful to your mate. The first person you should talk to is your spouse. Sit down and have an honest discussion about the problem. If your mate's flaws become damaging to your relationship, seek out the help of your Pastor or a Counselor. On a similar note, keep your marriage problems private. Seek help from your Pastor or seek Marriage Counseling. Sometimes even reading a good book on the subject may help; especially if the two of you read it together. Sharing your problems with family or friends tends to polarize the situation. Rarely, even if we are sure about it, is the person we go to objective. After all, they are our friend or family member and they care about us so much that they may not be objective. It is important to create appropriate division of household chores and parenting responsibilities. In the current day and age often there are two wage earners in the home. When Mom stays at home with the kids, she can be just as, if not more exhausted than Dad. In a Marriage, there is no place for close "personal "friends of the opposite sex. This can create significant problems in a relationship. Affairs often develop out of situations where a person goes to their friend because "they are not being understood" at home. When the "friend" steps in and fills that role it is fertile ground for an affair to develop. You may say that you are not that kind of person to let that happen. As Marriage Counselors, we hear those very words from many couples who come to us to try to heal from adultery. Be wise and make your spouse your only close friend of the opposite sex. One of the biggest complaints people make when they come in for marriage counseling is that they do not feel like they are number one with their spouse. This is true for men and women. It could be friends, work, hobbies, extended family, children or many other things. The best marriages always have husband and wife putting their spouse first (after God). Marriages thrive on closeness. Find ways to return to the closeness you once had. Look for ways to reduce boundaries between you and your spouse, leaving only healthy boundaries, and create healthy boundaries between your relationship and the outside world that protects your marriage.   Dr.Anil Gangotia

Theres No Second Chance in Life

Theres No Second Chance in Life TO THOSE OF US WHO ARE ALREADY THERE  AND TO THOSE WHO WILL SOON BE THERE The Secrets of Old Age Before middle age – Do not fear!  After middle age – Do not regret!  Enjoy Your Life While You Can!  Do not wait til you cannot even walk just to be sorry and to regret.  As long as it is physically possible, visit places you wish to visit. old colleagues & old friends Money kept in the banks may not be really yours.  When it is time to spend, just spend, & treat yourself well as you're getting old.  Whatever you feel like eating, just eat!  It is most important to be happy.          Treat sickness with optimism.  Whether you are poor or rich, Everyone has to go through the birth, aging, sickness and death.                      There is no exception, that's life. Do not be afraid or worried when you are sick.  Settle all the outstanding issues before hand      and you will be able to leave without regret.      Let the doctors handle your body,      God handles your life & loves you,        but be in charge of your own moods      If worries can cure your sickness, then go ahead and worry.      If worries can prolong your life, then go ahead and worry.      If worries can exchange for happiness, then go ahead and worry.        Our kids will make their own fortune. Look After Four Old Treasures      1. Your old body – pay more attention to health,      you can only rely on yourself on this. 2. Retirement funds – money that you have earned,      it is best to keep them yourself.      3. Your old companion – treasure every moment with your other half,   one of you will leave first.  PERFECT LOVE  4. Your old friends – seize every opportunities to meet up with your friends.  Such opportunities will become rare as time goes by.   WITH FRIENDS, EVERYDAY YOU MUST LAUGH, DANCE & BE HAPPY !!!       Running water does not flow back.   So is life, make it happy!                      ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE